Bunny Girl Blog

Why do good people always have to die? And the bad always end up living? It’s a question I asked a lot growing up without my parents there to guide me anymore. What I concluded was the same reason why prey always dies first. Like a helpless bunny in the forest. They don’t have it in them to do the things the predators do. Good people don’t play dirty. And that’s why they always lose in a game of cheap tricks… and that answer is most likely why I’m in the position I'm in. killing people I deem corrupt. Hoping to rid them all so this world can be brighter. But something has always felt off about it… Maybe I came to the wrong conclusion. I never was able to ask my parents about these questions. They died before I knew anything about the real world. What if I am wrong. What if I am throwing away everything my parents worked to give me by doing this? I have a hard time believing they would enjoy watching me take the road I'm taking. But maybe it’s okay. It’s not like I enjoy it eith...

  Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a sibling. Like an older brother. One who looks out for you similarly to a father, always wants you to meet the right guy. And make sure you’re not getting taken advantage of by dumb men. Or maybe a younger brother, though I don’t think I'd be too good of an older sister. I do wonder if I would have turned out differently with a sibling. Not sure why but when I think about it. I genuinely only think of my sibling being a boy. Maybe because they’d make me feel safer, they seem mentally strong. I don’t know. I feel like they could probably have handled this better than I did. Maybe thinking about that possibility is far fetched because they would have just died with my parents, who knows. But I really do think that just maybe, if I had a sibling. I wouldn’t have turned out like this. I would have had another set of ears, another mind, another human to form and share opinions and emotions with. I lost everything on that day. Maybe if ...

  I hate doing this. That may surprise you all. But I really really wish I could have just been the innocent kid I used to be forever. Well , maybe not forever. I know that’s impossible. I’d have to grow up at some point. But I believe having a good well spent childhood is something you need. Or at least it’s something everybody deserves, and I know not everyone gets it. And maybe if everyone did get a good childhood, there would be less corruption everywhere. It’s harder to be evil when your family truly loves you. It’s harder to bottle up your emotions all day when your family and friends told you it was okay to spill your feelings everywhere. It’s harder to lose friends when you know who it is you’re looking for. And who it is you need to be. A good childhood almost always depends on the parents. And my parents were better than I could possibly imagine at that. It’s not like they spoiled me. They still taught me necessary things I had to do on my own. And they didn’t get me what...

  Have you ever seen something clean in a dirty place, and felt like it doesn’t belong there. Or something beautiful in an ugly place. And you get that gross feeling. Like something wasn’t right? Well. One time. I saw a cute little white bunny in a dirty gross disgusting alleyway. The Bunny almost looked like it was glowing, while everything around it was muck. I remember thinking to myself “Such a shame that bunny is getting his perfect hands dirty in this disgusting place” and I wanted to pick it up and carry it somewhere less dirty. And then I looked at my hands… Covered in blood. I came to realize that… I belong here. In this alleyway. I’m just another dirty thing that didn’t belong anywhere near such a perfect and precious animal.

  The reason I wear a bunny costume is because I like Bunnies it’s as simple as that… Okay maybe it’s not so simple. As a kid I always looked up to bunnies. I wanted to be like them. They were so precious. But it’s clear now that… well... That ship has sailed. But still, for some reason I cling onto that childish dream. Maybe it makes me feel precious. Even though I’m a killer. Maybe it makes me feel like I’m still a child, even though I'm 23. 

  Listening to Hatsune Miku makes me feel alive. I love it! But it’s different from  Pattrick Watson. He makes me feel the effects of reality. It reminds me of the corruption around me, how I feel being a part of that world. And it reminds me of what I'm fighting for. Miku makes me feel alive, but not in the same way. More like I’m living in the world I dreamt of. I always thought that’s what life would be like when I was young. But my parents were just really really good at covering my eyes whenever there was something wrong in the world they didn't want me to see. And they’d smile at me while holding my hand, humming that lullaby I still can’t find the origin of.   The point is I’m aware Hatsune Miku and Pattrick Watson are a funny combination to be my 2 favorite artists. But what can I say! One makes me feel real, and the other makes me feel REAL. Side note. It took me so long to find a font I liked for this, because usually my handwriting is crazy and hard to re...